Boo.

I really like living in Scotland. It's a wonderful place full of wonderful people.

But I am sick today.

And all I want is some GD chicken noodle soup and crackers. I'm not even shooting for the moon here by thinking I should be so lucky to find chicken and stars. I just want chicken noodle soup.

Tesco?

Has neither.

No chicken noodle. There is chicken and vegetables. There is chicken broth. There is cock-a-leekie, which has (in addition to a funny name) chicken, carrots, and rice. But no chicken noodle.

The crackers didn't exist in any form. PRINGLES was the closest I could find to crackers. No saltines. No Triscuits. No Ritz. They just didn't have crackers.

So the moral of the story is that tonight, when I am sick, I really miss being in the States.

The end.